unemployment

so i don't have a job. well i do... i am a mother and oprah says that motherhood is not only a full time job but the most difficult job out there. so there's that. and lets get one thing straight i am not complaining about the lack of employment. all i wanted growing up was to one day not have a job. its true im one of those women. i'm cool with it. i have paid my dues you know. i worked for a long 8 years! i brought endless amounts of diet coke to golfers and soup, salad and bread sticks to the nice people of provo. dues paid. anywho i have been through several...phases if you will. different phases to fill my time. i would like to share them with you.


phase #1: the newborn phase
the newborn phase was rather difficult for me. at that time my dear baby would cry all the day long. he would only nap in my arms and he wanted to eat every two hours and it took him about an hour to eat each time... therefore my time was spent nursing, rocking holding, repeat.

phase #2: greys anatomy/nutella love affair phase

around four month my baby started to take a good 2-3 hour nap. in his crib. thats right he was a real baby now and life was good. i actually started watching greys when he was first born but it was always interrupted. so now i could eat nutella and just watch and watch for hours. it was unproductive and fattening but it was necessary. months later i would give away my jar of nutella because it was becoming a real problem.

phase #3: candle making phase

after watching all six seasons of greys anatomy and gaining what i can only imagine was a good 10 pounds it was time for a change. i still had those couple hour to kill during the day and what better way to spend my time then making candles. hello! who doesn't make candles when they're bored thats the real question. well it was a good time but now i have several candles that i just don't know what to do with...

phase #4: baking and treat making phase

this one was short lived.. all it took was one very failed attempt to make paula deens lemon blossoms and i was over it. i still bust out the occasional cookie when i'm feeling chubby though.


phase #5: cleaning frenzy phase

i think this was the only phase bryson truly appreciated. aside from the newborn one of course. i cleaned and organized everything. for several hours a day. my house smelled like lysol and windex. the laundry was freakishly caught up all the time. it was odd. well lets just say that phase didn't last as long as i was hoping.

phase #6: crafting...ish phase

who wants to clean when you can craft! however i do use the term "craft" lightly. my idea of crafting is finding things in my house i can mod podge. so i make picture frames and whatnot while watching 30 rock. and yes i consider that heart "garland" crafting. i had to cut out those hearts you know. and then i glued them to that string stuff. talent.

i guess you could say i am still in phase 6. however i have mod podged everything in my house so i will need to learn a new trade if you will. i am thinking of taking up sewing. i have taken a class before. if you consider seventh grade TLC a class, which i do. and as you can see my baby is only 9 months old so none of these phases last very long. i am trying to incorporate all phases into my life. you know balance or whatever.

i think its safe to say phase #7 will be pool time. here's to unemployment!